awakening.

So, needless to say, I am not the greatest at keeping up with this blog. Life gets busy and sometimes, I don't know what to say or how to say it. I'll try to get better but I can't make any promises. 

Do you ever just feel like you're not yourself and you have no idea why? That's where I've been for the past year. I haven't wanted to admit it, but I've honestly been depressed. That seems crazy considering being engaged and getting married is supposed to be the happiest time of your life. (Disclaimer: Please don't misunderstand me here. I am so incredibly happy. I have the world's best husband and I DO NOT regret getting married.) I just was lacking joy and I couldn't figure out what was going on. I tried getting into the Word more and surrounding myself with community. It would temporarily get me out of the rut but it wasn't long until I was back in there. 

Last weekend, the Lord really opened my eyes. We had a retreat with the BCM and God finally showed me the issue. I've been going through the motions. I haven't been finding my joy in Christ. This seems like it would be an obvious issue but it's so easy to trick yourself into thinking you're okay. After realizing the problem I've had for the past year, I still had no idea what to do about it. Why couldn't I find my joy in the one who saved me and showed me what true joy was? Why was I going through the motions still? 

The problem with living in the "Belt Buckle" of the "Bible Belt" is that everyone thinks that they are expected to be perfect Christians. Because of this, we put on a front. We act like everything is okay and that we aren't struggling with anything. This then turns into a vicious cycle. Because we don't want to admit we're dealing with some hard things, we don't ask other people how they're doing. So then, all of us are going around acting like we're okay and happy when we're struggling and not happy at all. This is a HUGE problem. This isn't how we were meant to live. We're supposed to share one another's burdens. We're supposed to ask for prayer when we're going through a rough time. We're supposed to have community to keep us accountable with the things we struggle with. And this isn't just for our own benefit. This is so when we find our joy in Christ, we keep finding it and our cup can overflow onto others. So others will see our joy and ask us where it comes from. When we don't get the first thing right, Christ can't be seen through us properly. THAT'S a BIG problem. 

I really encourage you guys, if you're struggling with something. Don't be afraid to admit it. God knows how to help you with what you're going through and a lot of times he uses other people in your life to do that. That's what he's done in my life. Don't get stuck in the rut. If you're there, get out. As quick as you can. Don't let the devil get even a toe-hold in your life. Be honest with yourself. Most importantly, be honest with God. And please don't stop your cup from overflowing. 

With His Love. For His Glory. 

It's about time.

Hey friends! Welcome to the new blog. To those of you who have been following me through the lack of posts on my old blog, thanks for being patient. Now that wedding planning is over, I think (and hope) that I will have a lot more time for blogging. It really is therapeutic!  My prayer for this blog is that is not only a refresher for me but that it is a blessing to those who read it.

First and foremost, in case you don't already know and can't tell from my new blog, I am newly married! CUH-RAZY! Y'all, I can't even believe it myself. The wedding was a beautiful day filled with lots of friends and family who made it absolutely perfect. We honestly couldn't have asked for a more wonderful day. If you want to see pictures click here! For our honeymoon we traveled to Riviera Maya, Mexico which is about 20 minutes south of Cancun. It was gorgeous and we had the BEST time. Besides the fact that we got to celebrate the gift of marriage, we both desperately needed a week long vacation. It was such a restful time for both of us. Look below for some pics of our trip. 

So lots of people think I am crazy for getting married at such a young age. Trust me, I sometimes think it's crazy too. But there's no denying that this is what God has called me to at this point in my life. Some of you may know my background and some of you may not but for time's sake, let's just say that I didn't have the greatest view of marriage growing up. It was not something I idolized or fantasized about as most young girls do. So when I met Seth and we started talking about our future and marriage and I felt at peace about it, I knew it had to be God. He's the only one who could (and still can!) make my fears and anxieties about marriage disappear. I can't explain it any other way. 

This road that Seth and I have set out upon will not be easy. In and of ourselves, we are selfish and uncompromising. But with God as our foundation and center, we will have unending joy and love through all of life's trials. And that is our hope and prayer; that we keep Christ as the center and never forget how he has worked in our lives. 

With all my love.

broken heart.

This semester has been chaotic to say the least. Lots of things have been going on in my life and I think there are too many to even tell you about.

But this week has changed so many aspects of my life. First, I saw a documentary called America the Beautiful 2. It was all about our culture's obsession with being "thin" and dieting and all that. It really got me thinking about my health and what motivates me to be healthy. Next, leadership interviews happened at the BCM. I didn't apply but again, God used an event to make me question some things about myself and my relationship with him. A few other things happened yesterday that I can't talk about yet. Then today, a guy at Murray State committed suicide ON OUR CAMPUS. I can't even wrap my head around it. Hours have passed and I'm still in shock. One thing remains, God is good. People are uniting to pray for him and those closest to him. Even in a difficult situation, God is glorified. Even though He hates this situation and DID NOT CAUSE IT, He has purpose in it. I pray that our campus and community cling to him during this tragic event.

 More updates will come soon, hopefully. I just had some free time and wanted to share things that are going on in my life. Maybe for spring break, I'll try to blog every day. We'll see. Love you guys.